For Lent, I gave up using my phone in the car.
The exception was Google Maps. No texting, no checking email, no socials, no Marco Polo, no NOTHING.
Car rides had become my times to catch up on work (as absurd as that sounds). “Hey Siri, text Jen Dary” was a regular refrain as I texted myself reminders and deadlines and people awaiting responses.
At first it was weird. I forced myself to pull over to the side of the road if there was an urgent need (text from a kid, usually) but, as time went on, a silent car felt normal. I’m not going to say it was life-changing but it sure was peaceful and, maybe most importantly, it was a firm boundary. One also imagines that I was being a safer driver.
This reminds me of the first day of any training that I run, in which I land the class by forcing a few seconds of silence. I instruct everyone to turn off Zoom video and then I count down from 10; when I hit 0, people turn their cameras back on and we begin. The way folks smile or lean back in their seats or even tear up a little when we officially come back on video is oh-so-endearing. It’s a lot; everything is a lot right now and I know how important it is to be cared for via quiet.
Soft meeting landings or silent car rides: please steal these tactics, as needed. Someone has to counterbalance the panic of the world…
… maybe it’s us?
Professional Development Hour!
Dr. Evelyn Carter, one of Plucky’s SNYAM grads has released an important book this year: Was That Racist?
I’m going to host Evelyn for an hour-long chat about the intersection of workplaces and diversity in our modern 2026 world. This is a free event; bring your lunch (or breakfast, depending on time zone!) and please register here.
This Zoom session is open to anyone at any level of any industry. Please share widely in your professional Slacks, Discords or with other colleagues!
(If you can’t make it live but you’d like a recording of the event, go ahead and register, too.)
Register Now
Boston and Westchester, NY!
I’ll continue my book tour with a few more stops on the East Coast before swinging Midwest during the summer and then West Coast in the fall. I would love to see you at one of these stops!
4/9, 6pm (Yorktown Heights, NY) (THIS IS IN TWO DAYS!)
Libri Cafe
4/13, 6:30pm (Cambridge, MA) (THIS IS NEXT WEEK!)
The Smoot Standard
5/4, 7pm (Arlington, VA)Book Club Reading & Signing at St. Michael’s Episcopal Church
5/10, 1-4pm (Seven Corners, VA)Mother’s Day Book Signing at Barnes & Noble
5/21 (deCordova Sculpture Park, Lincoln, MA) Second Harvest Spring Summit
One thing I didn’t note above is the fallout from silent car rides. I am, undoubtedly, less frequently connected to the same volume of people. For now, that’s okay. One cannot be a live LinkedIn at all hours of the day and one cannot remember every birthday.
Or, at least, I am choosing to take a break from that.
In the silence, I’ve had new ideas: scenes for the novel I’m writing, Plucky retreats, a zine. I hope, by not forcing these baby ideas into to-do lists, they have a little time to take root. If there’s anything I know for sure, it’s that noisy brainspace crowds out inner voices and my inner voice is my most valuable resource.
So off to the silent car, again, I go.
xo Jen
P.S. Are you looking for a Mother’s Day gift for your favorite Mom reader? I Believe in Everything: A Memoir of Illness, Motherhood, and Magic is a great option! (I mean… being a mom is literally in the title). Order a copy at your favorite bookstore or, if you prefer a signed copy, order it here!
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